Back in Wisconsin...

How is life back home? That is the question! But I don't mind it at all.... It makes me think (I have been doing a lot of that!), and it gives me a chance to share what God did and what God is doing in my life, even if I'm wondering that myself....

How does it feel to be back home, well it feels great! Its wonderful to be surrounded by family and friends and to be home where everything is familiar and welcoming. I'm constantly reminded how blessed we are! Like when I hop in the shower and the water comes out burning hot....when I look in my closet and see all the clothes I have...when I'm surrounded by people that love me and care for me....when I pick up my cell phone....when I walk into Walmart and see all the options and aisles and aisles of food....when I walk into the baby section and see children with their families....We are so blessed and don't even realize it!

Yet I see the things that Ecuadorians have that American's don't....a way of relaxing and enjoying life, when we are in such a hurry to stay on schedule....strong family ties and connections that most in America don't have....they are not consumed with technology....a survival mindset that most American's have to Google to find....

Do you miss Ecuador? You betcha! I miss the children, its so hard to crawl out of bed early when there are not six orphans babies waiting for me...I miss the tias, I miss the bread (O, it was the best!), I miss Natasha....the Spanish....the culture (never thought I would say that)...it is a different place, a different world....but my heart grew to love it!

I'm still shocked by little everyday things....like when I seen a white egg, and had to look twice.....when my nephew ran away from me when I went to hug him.....when my nephew came out in his little diaper and I said, O WOW, he is so white!!....when I see all the obese people that do practically nothing......when I see people complaining when they have it so easy....

Little bizarre things that happen to me now remind me of Ecuador, maybe I just didn't notice them before or forgot them, but now I see them and remember them, they make me laugh, and give me something else to tell Natasha! :)

Or the things that should embarrass me but I just smile and walk on....I'm use to the stares, and being noticed so I think nothing of it...

Has it changed you? I'm still finding out all the ways that God has worked and moved in my life, and I'm so thankful! But I don't want to go back, I wanted God to change my heart, life, priority's and perspective.

Would you go back? In a heartbeat! :) But for now I know this is where God has me, so I'm more than content and thankful to be here!

It's so hard to remember that not everyone has seen and been through what I have in the past three months, so I have to continually remind myself that I am the one who has changed, not them. God has so much to teach me yet here.....I'm thankful for my country, but grieving for my country, we seem to be so blind to the world around us, the world outside of our comforts.

So I take it one day at a time, trusting God for tomorrow, but this has been one of my biggest priority since I have been home. To do everything that I have been given to do today, to the best of my ability's. Because we never know how it will bless or encourage or bring glory to God.

And whatsoever ye do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men. Colossians 3:23

Whether therefore ye eat or drink, or whatsoever ye do, do all to the glory of God. 1 Corinthians 10:31

life as I have lived it.....

Nothing to amazing, it may not surprise you at all.......

In Miami, they give out toothpicks with your meal, and people actually use them and walk around with them in their mouth.... my dad would love it!

I tipped the man that helped me put my luggage 50 cents and he said, he needed a dollar.....what??

Walking down the street between two Ecuadorians and someone says, "Do you smell something burning?" Me, O its probably my skin.....they look at me and laugh!

Little boys walking around shining shoes, looked down at my flip flops, then laughing asked me if they could shine my shoes..... :) Sometime you don't have to speak the language to understand.

It was probably 70 some degrees in the house and the tia told me I need to have a jacket on because its to cold....?

Applying sunscreen on the bus, surrounded by people who don't have a clue what sunburn is like!

Looking behind you on the bus and seeing a guy playing with your friends hair.....Yep, I was laughing! :) I'm sure he has never seen real red hair before!

Being sent into the men's side of the restroom.....really? Well I didn't have a choice, at least these men had enough courtesy to use the restroom and not the sidewalk...to bad I had to barge in on them.....why me?

This is Natasha and this is Brianna....Natasha and ??? Natasha and ??? yes, my name is not very Ecuadorian friendly, I always have to repeat it! many never catch it... I have been told numerous times that my name is very hard to say, it is very American, and they have never heard of it before...

Driving down the road and cows run out in front of us....

Driving through the street of Ecuador and on a wall I see written. "I like you very much!" lol definitely written for a gringa, I think!

A little girl at an orphanage kept pulling up my pant leg to see my white leg....

Melting hot with the sun glaring down and the Ecuadorians have sweaters on....

Taking pictures with Ecuadorians and I feel like a giant!

The embarrassment when you go to ask someone how much something costs and you ask them how old they are....oooppps ya I know your beyond the age of that being appropriate...sorry

The tiny little Indigenous lady that says, "cuidado gringetas". "Be careful little white girls".

O, the laughs, O, the joys, O, the fun that we had! It's an experience that lives on in my heart, and one I'm not soon to forget....

It's all been quite an experience and just how I have lived it....

Almost home...

So I spent a day at the airport....walking....sleeping....walking....sleeping.....but it actually passed by fairly rapidly. I wanted to venture out a little into Miami, but figured without knowing anything about it and the transportation system (I've heard its not the best), being so exhausted the best thing to do would be to sit tight and make sure I get on that flight! I got my boarding pass and felt like the richest girl in the world...I don't know why though, I have two from yesterday that didn't do me any good! People are in the line to reschedule again, but its not nearly as long as last night, but I sure hope I don't end up there tonight!

Well I spent my day at the airport! The time didn't go too slow, I was able to get a little snooze in throughout the day and was blessed with some phone calls and notes from folks to help pass the time. My hands got very sore from toting my carry on all over the airport but at least I was able to get around! My fight got delayed by half an hour, I was pretty worried! Then we boarded late but when I finally sat down, I fell asleep from pure exhaustion  a while late I woke up and thought....o we are still on the ground...but realized we were up in the air and I had slept through it all! I can't believe I slept through a take-off! But I fell back asleep and slept most of the way to Minneapolis. We hit quite a bit of turbulence toward the end. But finally we landed and headed for baggage and my parents! It was so wonderful to see them! And wonderful to be out of Miami! And wonderful to get out of airports! Well all the snow melted in time so it is just freezing cold and rainy....brrr its really cold! Its only 35 degrees! (haha I know really thats warmer). So off we went for home, and I slept like a log on the way home too! My eyelids feel like they weigh 5 lbs. each....I'm planning on fixing that tonight, well it's almost 5 am....so this morning, I guess. The house is so hot! By brother has it up to 80 + degrees in here...lol I am not use to these temperature changes! We didn't have any heat in Ecuador.... But its so crazy and wonderful to be home! The dog is huge, the house looks different (remodeling), but its all strangely familiar and feels good! A nice big glass of cold water, all my things around me, my bed, but most of all my family...well I will see my brothers and sisters in the morning....please, O please....don't wake me up.....

When I started this blog it was going to be for my family, church family and I thought a few other people might read it...I have been amazed, shocked, humbled and encouraged by all the people reading this blog and praying for me on my journey in Ecuador!

This blog has had over 5,000 pageviews which is incredible! People from other countries, Germany, Russia, Ecuador, United Kingdom, Italy, Belarus, Canada, China and France have stopped by this blog!

I started it as a challenge to myself to see if I actually could post everyday, I didn't think I could, but I did it! Well besides the time that the Internet wasn't working. It wasn't easy, its takes a lot of time....or maybe I just have a lot to say...but anyway I know that all of you didn't come back day and day to just hear what I had to say. So many people have learned, been blessed by, challenged and encouraged by these daily blog posts and I know I couldn't do that. Any good that has come from this blog is from God, may He have all the praise! I am only an empty vessel that has been filled with the Holy Spirit of God.

Thank you all for coming by and taking this journey with me....but I know that its not over....this journey will affect the rest of my life. When I set out I prayed that God would allow me to at least be a blessing in one persons life.... well even if my time here didn't bless anyone else, the changes it has brought about in me would be enough! But so many times along the way, I have been blessed to see the way that God used my time here, we are not alway blessed with seeing "behind the scenes", we don't always know the reason and why God does things. But how amazing it is to be able to see even a small part from Gods eyes. I'm just so thankful that God called me, that God chose me, that He allowed me to follow Him to Quito, Ecuador, to serve Him.

And they were beyond measure astonished, saying, He hath done all things well. Mark 7:37

Heading for the USA

Well folks I have lived in Ecuador for three months but now its time to head for home.... I had an early morning! I was all packed up and stepped outside the gate at 4:45....5 minuets early. The taxi was already waiting.... Which was odd because it was suppose to be at the orphanage... But he said the code word so I hopped in! but told him to wait for one more, Cathrine who was coming from the orphanage. Well we waited for about 10 minuets and I start to worry.... She was going to accompany me and I was suppose to give her my keys..... So at about 5 min. till just in case I hopped out and started walking down the street a little to see if any lights were on in the house then I seen her coming!! O Joy!! So we hopped in and she had been waiting inside the gate the whole time inside the gate but the taxi didn't look yellow and she was worried about the random parked car.... Well praise the Lord we were all in and in our way in time! 

So we went to the old airport where I got a shuttle to the new airport. It was very easy and nice but I was thankful she came along anyway! The shuttle was an hour ride so I was able to gaze at the mountains and meditate on all the memories I have here....its amazing what Ecuador has come to mean to me in 3 short months!

The new airport is wonderful! Very easy and everyone was very helpful and a man stood in line and waited with me to help with my bags... I have an extra suitcase because they filled one up with donations for the orphanage on my way down. Thank you God for all these little blessings!

I had a beautiful flight to Miami....I slept, I was so tired! But when we arrived at the airport we had to wait almost an hour to be taxied to the gate....we found out that there was a computer outage! Over 30 flights were canceled! So here I am in Miami Florida ... But my flight was late enough that it wasn't canceled!! I'm so thankful but it took about three hours for me to get through customs, check my bags back in and get through security again! But what else did I have to do? News reporters were all over the place it was crazy! This was a huge thing. You never know someone might have seen me on the news...

Welcome to the United States of America! It was rather thrilling when I walked under the sign and through customs for citizens....
Ecuador doesn't feel to far away but I'm in Miami after all.... Half the people still speak Spanish. But I'm not so big anymore, and I don't stick out, and people are not staring at me... Yet somehow I feel a little out of place. The styles are different...the people act different and I keep expecting certain things to happen...then I remember I'm not in Ecuador anymore....Its all rather bittersweet ... Then I see the currency exchange with no guards and I think what is the matter with these people?

I love takeoffs, definitely my favorite part, and going through the clouds. It is so beautiful, so much blue and white.... I have to start singing praise songs....only Gods handiwork could create anything so magnificent!

And I heard a great voice out of heaven saying, Behold, the tabernacle of God is with men, and he will dwell with them, and they shall be his people, and God himself shall be with them, and be their God. And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away. And he that sat upon the throne said, Behold, I make all things new. And he said unto me, Write: for these words are true and faithful. And he said unto me, It is done. I am Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end. I will give unto him that is athirst of the fountain of the water of life freely.

He that overcometh shall inherit all things; and I will be his God, and he shall be my son. But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death. Revelation 21:3-8

I couldn't help but think how beautiful these verses are....what we as christians have to look forward to at the end of this life (whenever that may be). But how dreadful on that day to not be in Christ. So may we live with eternity in view so we don't leave behind those that we may have taken with us if we had opened our mouths more and loved the souls of men more. How beautiful and glorious heaven will be... No more tears, no more suffering! To be with Christ for all eternity! O, I long for the day when I shall meet my Savior face to face, O it will be worth it all!

Well my flight got delayed after all.... and delayed....and delayed...then canceled....So I purchased some WiFi so I could let my mom and dad know so they didn't go all the way to the airport...but all they had was a phone and I mine was not activated...so I am messaging people and they are calling them....and I end up standing in a line that had over 400 people in line trying to get tickets...my brother activated my phone, which was such a blessing! Then I was able to talk to my mom and tell her that some people were able to call and bet their flights booked on the phone, which may not take as long as the line....so after I spent probably 4 hrs in line and my mother spent several on hold...she got me a ticket! So its 2:30 in the morning...now what? For the exact same time as the one today was suppose to go out...But praise the Lord! I got a ticket! I was in line with some wonderful people, so it helped pass the time....I was able to share all about my trip and the little ones I left behind! It was a highlight of a rather long night...

Well I always thought that all the crazy things that happened in Ecuador were because Natasha was there but now she is beginning to question this...

This airline system failure is crazy! It is huge, I can't imagine how many people have been stranded all across America! check it out about 900 flights were directly impacted by this!

Well I guess I'm going to go find a spot to curl up for awhile....

An Orphans Prayer

An Orphan's Prayer
I am waiting...somewhere far, far away....on the other side of this world. I may not know who you are or what you look like,
But somehow, deep in my heart, I know you will come and find me.

It's a long journey, and it takes a lot of time.
I wish I could make it easier.
But I know that the ones who come for me will not count the cost. They will only see the joy of finding me.

For now, I abide in the fields of the fatherless.
Day by day wondering, "Why was I born here and not somewhere else?" Asking, "Why couldn't my life have been different?"
It is so lonely....

Even though I am surrounded by hundreds of other children, I know that something is missing.
I know in my heart I need a place to call home.

My arms long to be wrapped in a father's embrace...
I long to be saved by a mother's love.
Gazing out the orphanage window, I offer a prayer of hope, "Oh God, please help them come quickly."

Even as I lay in the darkness each night somehow I feel assured. That no matter how lost I appear, I am not alone.
Holy hands guard my steps and sacred fingers wipe my tears.... Touching my lonely heart.The One who made me, the God who knew me before I was born, Hears me every time I call, He whispers his promises in my ear.

I listen with hope to His voice.

But what I worry about most is that no one wants to look for me. The fields are vast, and there are so many scattered all over the earth. I wonder how one little child, so lost, can be found.

Yet He calms my heart and assures me that He will find you.
That He will make sure you hear His voice clearly,
He has promised me that He will make a way through the fields,
That he will personally cut a path, and lead you right to my orphanage door.

My prayer is...When He speaks, please don't forget to listen, When He calls, don't be too afraid to go...

For I am waiting....somewhere far, far away.

Author Unknown

My last day in Ecuador....crazy...surreal....
As sad as today was it was also joyful! I'm so thankful God brought me here! As I looked around I seen memories everywhere, people, places, and most of all children that I have grown to love! I'm leaving but I will take a piece of it all back home with me to live in Wisconsin....

I thank my God upon every remembrance of you, Always in every prayer of mine for you all making requests with joy, For your fellowship in the gospel from the first day untill now; Being confident of this very thing, that He which hath begun a good work in you will perform it untill the day of Jesus Christ. Philippians 1:3-6

This morning was a special morning spent with the babies and toddlers...

haha Buenas Dias to you to!

Waiting for Breakfast....just like my first morning with them....but wow have things changed!

love that cheese!

Babies, Babies, Babies...

Still adorable....still stealing my heart....

But the clock kept ticking so pretty soon I headed down to Casa Harlow to say goodbye to the first tias that were getting off shift...so I played with the children as I was waiting to say goodbye....Miss A come up to me with her Bible and plops on my lap... So I open it up to Lucas 1:37 and read "Porque ninguna cosa será imposible para Dios." Then I told her that I am praying her family comes soon, she looked at me with a big smile and said, "for me?" The tears started rolling.....yes for you! She looked at me and asked, "why are you crying?" The flood came....because I'm very sad....Why are you sad...because I'm leaving and I'm going to miss you very much! But I'm praying your family comes soon, that would make you very happy wouldn't it? Her smile lit up her face! Si! So then we read our verse and I tried to stop the tears, but they couldn't stop. I'm going to miss this little girl so much! I think she might miss me too....

So once the tears had started for the day, there was no stopping them! So I said goodbye to two tias then headed back up to the baby house for the rest of the morning...

I adore this little guy...

This one has my heart!

Princess!

I love these ladies in Blue!

You're going to leave??

So I enjoyed one last dip in the pool with my splashing buddy! The morning was amazing! I enjoyed every moment, every last, every tear. Because maybe the tears say what I can't....how much these people and this place has come to mean to me!

I was suppose to work on packing this afternoon but I had to call Natasha to give her one last update..... well I'm at it, I might as well give you one!

The little baby that is in the hospital is doing much better! She is on very little oxygen and prayerfully will be coming home at the end of the week.

The little boy that went home with his mother over a month ago, is in the same hospital and is very sick with pneumonia and I'm not sure what else. They said, he is very skinny and sick. Please pray for him and his mother.

And my landlady is cleaning my room and trying to move me out before I actually leave....really can't you just wait until tomorrow?? 

So I headed to the office and finished up what I wanted to get done there....said my goodbyes....

Then I headed down to play with the older children...each one has become so special to me! They finished up my M & M's for me too!

The queen...

The two sweethearts!

Yum! Yum!

She is one sweet, beautiful little girl!

Full of energy, smiles and fun!

So after a few more goodbyes on shift change I went back up the babies to help with a last couple of bottles and to start my goodbyes to the children.

They were all having so much fun! I tried to be brave for them...really do they need to see my tears?

I'm going to miss this little guy a lot too! He is so much fun!

Sweet little girl!

She does walk too!

Goodbye to the babies....

Yes, I sobbed...this little guy has come to mean the world to me! I pray he gets a wonderful family! 

This one may be getting one very soon..

Can I have one too?

This little girl has changed so much!

This one can sit up now!

So I cried my way through these sweet goodbyes...

I'm so torn saying goodbye, I want to stay here with them, and yet, I don't want them to stay here at all! I want them to all go to families and homes. To grow up knowing where they belong, being taught about the Lord Jesus Christ.

This is the orphanage guard and his right hand man!

Tias!

I can't believe I am really saying goodbye....it's so hard to believe. I know I am leaving but it still doesn't seem real!

So then I had to go say goodbye to the older children. They were eating supper so I tried to make it as quick and cheerful as possible! A quick kiss, but the tears were still welling up then Miss A threw her arms around me and held on to me...tears spilt...I never thought three months ago that I would be leaving behind this little girl who has become like a sister to me....God please, please make her part of my family...it just doesn't seem complete without her anymore....

This evening Tanya, Kathrine and Sebastian had a nice little goodbye dinner for me....I can't believe this time it was my turn...we had fresh pineapple! and my all time favorite....PIZZA! Its was delicious and Kathrine made red velvet whoopie pies! We played a game and one question was...what is one trait you would like from each person....it was a hard question....but it was so great to think about, and a blessing to tell others things you admire in them and in turn to hear what others think of you. Often times its not what you would think and its encouraging! I think I need to point out these things in others more and be more of an encourager! So we had to take a few photos to end the evening....

I was suppose to put it on timer....but accidently took one right away...haha its great!

Here we go! I have blessed very much by these people! I'm so thankful for them and the part they have each had in my time here.

Just for fun!

Ok its my last night here....we had to do something crazy...

As I left the orphange tonight and walked down the street one last time....I enjoyed the air, the sky, the walk, my last night in Ecuador....

the barb wire fences...this one was an accident....buts its so Ecuador!

The city lights....

So here I am finishing up! I'm almost packed up now I just need to get a little sleep before I get up and start the journey home.... thats what it is...a journey and we never know what God has waiting on the other side...

One last Sunday...

Today dawned cloudy and chilly, but soon it cleared up and it was a bright sunny day! I was reading this little pamphlet that my Grandma sent to me, it was such a blessed and sweet way to start out the day!

My Lord and I

Words of a hymn sung in the rocks and caves of France during the fierce persecution of the Huguenots, 300 years ago.

I have a friend so precious, So very dear to me,

He loves me with such tender love, He loves so faithfully.

I could not live apart from Him, I love to feel Him nigh;

And so we dwell together, My Lord and I.

Sometimes I'm faint and weary, He knows that I am weak,

And as He bids me lean on Him, His help I gladly seek.

He leads me in the paths of light, Beneath a sunny sky,

And so we walk together, My Lord and I.

I tell Him all my sorrows, I tell Him all my joys,

I tell all that pleases me, I tell Him what annoys;

He tells me what I ought to do, He tells me what to try,

And so we walk together, My Lord and I.

He knows how much I love Him, He knows I love Him well; 

But with what love He loveth me, No tongue can ever tell.

It is an everlasting love, in ever rich supply;

And so we love each other, My Lord and I.

He knows how I am longing, Some weary soul to win;

And so He bids me go and speak, A loving word for Him.

He bids me tell His wondrous love, and why He came to die,

And so we work together, My Lord and I.

He tells me of His kingdom, It is not far away;

And Oh, His heart is longing, To take me there someday;

Immortal joys are waiting, And joys that never die;

Soon there we'll reign together, My Lord and I.

How sweet it is to walk with the Saviour and live from day to day. I did not know such joy and contentment, until I was content in Him. Many things I can live without, but when a shadow is between us, I can't rest until its out.

Yea doubtless, and I count all things but loss for the excellency of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord: for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and do count them but dung, that I may win Christ, And be found in Him, not having mine own righteousness, which is of the law, but that which is through faith of Christ, the righteousness, which is of the law, but that which is through the faith of Christ, the righteousness which is of God by faith: That I may know Him, and the power of His resurrection, and the fellowship of His sufferings, being made conformable unto His death. Philippians 3:8-10

May I be emptied of myself so I can be filled with the Holy Spirit, so I can walk as He walks, so I can love as He loves, so I can give as He gives, so I can show mercy, passion and forgive as He has forgiven me.

After church we visited with some folks before heading to eat at Crepes & Waffles! It's a wonderful place to eat with delicious ice cream! :) So then we wandered around Quito for a while before heading home.

When I got home and started doing a few things I started missing all the children so much! Is that possible? I haven't even left yet.... So I dropped everything I was doing and went to the orphanage to hang out and see everyone! They are such a joy! I nearly started crying when I walked into the baby room and see all the smiling happy babies. Then suddenly "What a friend we have in Jesus" starts playing on the radio.... Its like a playback of 2 1/2 weeks ago.... but I know that God will be with me and help me to say my goodbyes. It's so hard to leave the places you love but I know that God's time has come.....Please pray for me tomorrow as I have a lot of goodbyes to say....

I have one last day in Ecuador....

A lovely, relaxing Saturday

But unto every one of us is given grace according to the measure of the gift of Christ. Ephesians 4:7

I have seen so many different gift and different measures of grace. Orphans, many are looked over and cast aside. But they are precious children that are made in the image of God, they have scars and may not look beautiful, but when we "stop to smell the roses" we see the beauty and wonder in them. They are gifts from God. Disabilities, people are often measured by them. But they to are special, wonderful people that are made in the image of God. They are precious to Him, and He has bestowed upon them some of the most beautiful smiles, laughs, and wonderful personalities. Their  smiles can melt the clouds and their laughter can bring joy. Their accomplishments are so appreciated, the things we take for granted. If we take the time to appreciate them, and see the world through their eyes, these are the ones that will teach us about God.

Today was a perfect Saturday, relaxing, tranquil and spent with some of my favorite people....

Hello from all of us!!!

Enjoying her gifts....

What a sweet, wonderful day! I spent lots of time with the children! We played, read and learned Spanish! I had a wonderful time with the tias as well! I need some help eating up all my chocolate so this afternoon I brought M & M's with me! The children enjoyed them immensely  In fact I have never seen children savor and enjoy a tiny handful of M & M's more! I think we have enough for everyone to have some more on Monday....

I was rewarded with lots and lots of hugs and kisses, everyone piled on my lap and fought over me....o the pains of being loved! I'm so thankful I have been able to meet all of these special children and have been able to be a small part of their lives!

This evening I was browsing through my blog, and it is amazing to look back on everything that we have done, all the people God has brought across my path, all the lives that have blessed me. Remembering the heartaches, trials, the sweet times, the challenging times, the memories, the laughs, the joys, the friendships but most of the Love that brought me through it all! I have been so blessed, God has protected me, watched over me, and humbled me through it all.