My last day

Late to bed...early to rise...

Dear Jesus this is my last day and I'm trusting you to see me through it.

Well 6:30 in the morning mom and I head to the orphanage...One last morning to help with all the precious babies.

Here they are....smiles shining through the tears....kinda like me....What has Ecuador done to me?

One last chat with the guard, one last wall to the tienda, one last walk with my sisters, one last look out my window, one last chat in Spanish with my baby sister, one last time to eat sharma and see all the people who have come to mean so much to me over the last 6 weeks....

My heart is breaking....I'm really leaving....O God, I'm trusting you!

Leaving....

I'm leaving tomorrow.....

Do you know how hard it is to swallow those words..... do you know how difficult it is to pack up my suitcases and take my sisters to the airport and leave this place that my heart had grown to love... not once.... but two times over!

I know the time spent here is so minimal compared to my time at home but the things I have experienced here have touched my heart and changed my life.

So I'm going home tomorrow....I will pack my suitcases and I will finish saying goodbye to everything that is dear to me here and I will get on the plane and I will take my sisters home.... but once again Wisconsin won't get the same girl that left. I will have to go back to work and adjust to life at home and there are many things I'm looking forward to again.... but I know that it will never quite be the same..... Ecuador has stolen even more of me....

There are so many things I want to stick in my suitcase and take back with me.... like 25 children, and my favorite soda and the most amazing potato chips and my regular bottle of grape juice that I have drank almost everyday and the fresh bread and the typical food and the fruit and the avocados and....so much more!

Then there are the experiences.... like walking out in the morning and being greeted by all the security guards as I walk down the street, the nice man that cut my hair, the friendly waiter that spoke English, the tienda vendor...Each one holds a special place....Each will be missed....

Maybe it's harder because I have to leave part of my family here when I want so badly to stay with them but either way tonight is my last night here and it's so hard to leave this place I love!

Covi

HELLO!!!
Yes, I am still in Ecuador and I am still a live and I know I am over due for an update! :)

These last couple of weeks have been very busy for me, I have had some more opportunity's to volunteer and I went to Covi one day this week and one the day before. This was a ministry that I was able to go to once with Natasha, so it was really a blessing to be able to go back.

It is a ministry for school aged children that have family's but have a bad family life or their family's live in poverty. Here the children only go to school for half a day so the children that go to school in the morning come in the afternoon and vice versa.  The children come to Covi to have a good meal, get help with homework, have a safe place to stay, get their clothes washed and have people to look after them. It is really a sweet place to be and see these children and how they are flourishing in this setting the lady that oversees this ministry has such a heart for these children! She patiently talks with them, helps them, feeds them, prays for them and teaches them about the Lord.

I also met a group of people who are on the World Race. It is a mission trip where they go to 11 different country's in 11 months. They are three months in so it has been really fun to get to know them and hear about their adventures thus far!

Another huge blessing is the new Psychologist speaks good English and loves his job so I was able to talk to him a lot about his job, what he does and each of the children, their backgrounds and their struggles. It was such an amazing blessing! I know not everyone wants to talk to Psychologist all day but after all it is what I am studying at the moments in school.... it was amazing to get some "hands on" information! :)

It is a busy place, serving around 50 children Monday -Friday, but it is a fun place where children play and laugh, where songs of praise are sung to God, where children have someone to look after them and care for them and someone to help with their homework. Yes, I actually did help a little boy do his homework in Spanish. I'm not sure if it was harder for him or for me! But it was good for both of us I'm sure.

I know it is strange for me to do a blog post with no pictures, but some things are better remembered in your heart and that seems to be how the days that I spent at Covi are, they were sweet and wonderful days that I won't ever forget....

To sweet for pictures....

We have continued to spend day's at the orphanage....

I just love it!
I just adore the children!
I love the tias! They are as amazing and hard working as ever!
But I been simply reveling in the moments and forgetting to take pictures....
My heart can remember these moments so well, a photo just can't seem to capture what I see....

Sometimes I play with each child, I watch each one play, I get each one to smile and laugh, I pray for them and for their future forever family's! Each one is so dear, so precious, so perfect....Words just can't explain it!

The tears, the smiles, the joy or sadness that you see in their eyes...the healing or the pain...they are so real, so honest, so perfectly made in the image of God!

The last morning I was there, the tia that watches the babies had to take the youngest to the hospital so I watched the other two babies. The one was very, very fussy and I have no idea why! So I broke every rule in the orphanage book of rules and I held him (for a long time!), I bounced him, I hugged him and played with him and he finally fell asleep...so I laid him down and he woke up awhile later just screaming so I picked him up and rocked him.....until he fell asleep....then I rocked until I fell asleep.....

So baby G and senorita Brianna slept on in the rocking chair....I'm not sure who was happier?...
It was one of those moments that I will never forget...the peaceful happy baby in my arms and the feelings of purpose and fulfillment. I know there is never anything else I will ever do that will be more important than this.

Father of the Fatherless and Protector of Widows is God in His holy habitation. 

My heart is growing sad as I count the days to go back home....but I look forward to the future and seeing how God is going to twine all of this into my future and what He has for me! I'm so excited! But first I need to write this outline...so I can write my paper....so I can get a good grade....so I can graduate.... and then....but wait, thankfully I don't have to wait to serve God and I know that he has many opportunity's for me to serve Him waiting at home....so one step at a time.....

My Heart

I forgot what it was like to be sun-burnt, (ya I think I may be the reddest person in Ecuador!)
                                                         exhausted,        
                                                                     and emotional spent.
As Ecuador has a special way of doing to me......

Honestly it's hard being in a foreign country! I love it and wouldn't trade it for anything! But it is very hard, you spend all day trying to understand people, customs and a way of life that is far different. Not to mention constantly fighting a language barrier....It is physically painful sometimes when you want to talk to people and communicate on a level that is impossible because you simply can not understand each other or do not know how to communicate what you want to say. So I guess these are the situations where you find out what you are really made of.....I don't have my best friend next door to call over, I can just hop in my car and drive; the challenges are right here and not going anywhere....but must be embraced....So when the day has been long or the night has been short....I have this beautiful view to look out on and say, Thank you Lord!

Thank you for the challenges and thank you for showing my more of myself. Thank you for not deserting me but walking with me.

I think being here is a good reminder that I am only a stranger passing through this world....it wasn't made for my comfort...it wasn't made to last forever....we only have a short time.....so what really is important?

The most important things to me are my Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ and the souls of men that are lost without Him. Then I wonder am I giving everything for the cause of these two things?

A different sort of Hospital

On Sunday afternoon I was asked to visit with a little boy who was at the hospital. He has been in the hospital for at least 5 days and the tia had been with him the entire time! They never leave a child at the hosptial alone so she had not left him. I was very excited at the opportunity but still the experiences never cease to amaze me!

How could I, a white girl from America, be given such a wonderful opportunity? There is honestly nothing I would rather do in the world than spend my afternoon with a child who bares the title of being an orphan. If only you could have only been with me! If only you could have only looked into his sweet and weak eyes. If only you could have only seen what I seen I know you would feel the same way. Orphans have a way of changing your life forever... they are so innocent that they don't even mean too, but you know you will never be the same.

For them it's their life...for me it's a passion!

I found myself being dropped off on a street corner with directions to the bedside of a sick little prince charming (and did he ever win me over!). I followed directions and a kind guard showed me to cama 23. Lets just say it is an amazing feat to make it through an Ecuadorian Hospital with my Spanish skills and get where you need to go...obviously God was going before me.

I walked into a bare room! Coming from a small town hospital in the States..... to here...(I don't even think I will be able to take anyone's complaints seriously anymore....) I practically swallowed my tongue! I walked in the room and seen enough violations to get me fired! But miraculously this little boy is on the mend. It's amazing all the things that we "think" we need that apparently people can really live without.....

 He has had a blood transfusion a few day's earlier, he was very weak and wasn't up to talking very much, so I did the talking and he just nodded his head...I used my limited Spanish and read to him. I smiled and told him my Spanish needs some more practice... to which he rewarded me with a small smile. Dinner came and interrupted us.... he sat up, with one arm curled up next to him and the other armed with a HUGE soup spoon. He ate up his soup then attacked his pile of white rice and jabbed at his chicken leg. Somehow we got his chicken leg cut up into eatable bites for a sick boy and he ate what he could then collapsed back into bed and curled up for the afternoon. So I sat and studied Spanish.....

He dozed in and out...you would have thought that it didn't matter if I was there or not....

I didn't do much....

I helped him eat lunch, I read him a chapter from his book and talked to him a little. I shut the window and tucked him in. Then I sat their waiting and praying for this sweet little boy....

The question that swirled in my head.....What will the rest of his life look like?

Eventually it was time to leave...his caregiver had not returned yet, so I tucked him in, whispered in his ear, and kissed his cheek...and I swear...there were tears glistening in his eyes...but I didn't mind, because mine were glistening right back....

I don't understand why God allowed me to live the life I have..... I used to think I had it so rough...wait, sometimes I still do....what is wrong with me? When I look in the mirror tonight I only see a girl who has been so blessed that she should be the first in line to give up anything that is asked of her.....I want to be that girl, God make this self-centered person into that girl...